A US Postal cycling jersey will make you look like a giant red, white and blue postal stamp. Or…you may be mistaken for one of ‘the Team’. So put on your Postal cycling jersey, suck in your gut, flex your quivering quads, and sign those autographs!
But here’s the dark side of the postal jersey- it’s hard to imagine the jersey looking good with black cycling shorts. So now you’re committed to the whole enchilada…meaning the matching postal shorts. And when you’re wearing the whole enchilada it’s hard to be inconspicuous about your Tour de France fantasies.
Don’t Stop There!
You might as well go all the way. Get your cycling buddies to all spring for the US Postal cycling outfit. Get in a paceline, one Postal jersey following another. You’ll make quite an impression.
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Don’t Listen To This Guy
I read a commentary by a sour cynic who rightly determined that such a riding group was not a professional team at all, but instead some pencil necks out riding during their lunch break. In his venomous writings he wondered who the group was trying to fool.
He even went so far as to challenge the need to wear aerodynamic clothing at all. Wouldn’t loose t-shirts and baggy shorts flapping in the wind increase the benefits of the exercise experience? Although I think his points had a lot of merit…he’s an idiot.
A Few Digressions Never Hurt
But I digress. There are a whole slew of US Postal cycling clothes. Jerseys, both long and shorts sleeved. Wind vests. Wind shell jackets…and the list goes on.
Once more I digress… Last night on Monday Night Football I saw a whole stadium of Steelers fans all wearing Steelers jerseys. Old ladies, young boys, pot bellied men, and 90 pound weaklings. Except for the pot bellied men, I doubt that any of them had ever been intimate with the ole pigskin. And yet they all felt justified in impersonating a Steeler.
So what about us cyclists? Why can’t we put on the US Postal jersey? Can’t we pretend we’re pulling Lance Armstrong along to glory? After all, at least we’re out there pedaling. That’s better than those Pittsburg fanatics are doing.
The Steeler fans are only shuffling to the restrooms after drinking too much beer. Some of them don’t even get out of their seats, for heaven’s sake. They’ve inserted a catheter before the game. Don’t want to miss any gridiron action!
Beware- The Polish Interloper
But beware! There’s an interloper in the neighborhood. Namely the Polish Postal cycling jersey. Having grown up on Polish jokes, my first inclination was to think that someone was pulling my pseudo-Polish leg.
A POLISH postal cycling jersey? They get mail? Hey, who taught them to read?
So have a little fun. Get a U.S. Postal Cycling jersey. Better yet, get a Polish Postal Cycling jersey. I think they look better.