This short primer on men’s cycling shorts will get you up to speed. If you are new to the world of cycling shorts you’ll read about the basics on this page. If you want to read some of the same info but with an amusing twist I recommend you go to Bike Shorts.

It’s more entertaining.

On this page we’ll cover materials, number of panels, pricing, leg length, bib shorts, and the chamois insert. By the time you’re done reading you’ll be ready to slap yourself back into an alert state of mind and order the perfect pair of men’s cycling shorts.

What Are These Slinky Men’s Cycling Shorts Made Of?

It doesn’t take a genius to see that men’s cycling shorts are made of a very revealing, stretchy material (usually Lycra or a facsimile of Lycra).

Because all lumps and bumps are exposed, many a brave man has been reluctant to take up cycling. And then there is my rotund neighbor… Seeing him coach youth soccer in his cycling shorts made me wish he had a lot less courage.

I can get twice as much because I keep my eyes
open for deep discounts on Mens’ Cycling Shorts at Bike Nashbar.

Usually the materials used for men’s cycling shorts come in two different weights. Six weight material weighs six ounces per yard and eight weight weighs eight ounces per yard. The eight weight material costs a bit more, wears longer, and has a tighter, ‘gripping’ feeling.

Number of Panels In Bike Shorts For Men

Quality men’s cycling shorts are made of either six or eight panels (looks like cyclists are hung up on the numbers six and eight). Eight panel biking shorts are reputed to be more form fitting. They are KNOWN to be more expensive.

When cycling shorts were made of non-flexible materials, having more panels allowed the cycling short to ‘turn the corners’ of the anatomy better. Now with spandex, some of the ‘turning’ is done via the stretch rather than the extra seams in the eight panel short.

A Variety of Prices In Men’s Cycling Shorts

You can get men’s cycling shorts for as little as $30 and as much as $200+. Castelli shorts are known for the scorpion emblem that they put on your rear panel. That’s worth a lot to some cyclists. Assos brand is known for the earnest Swiss seamstresses who lovingly piece together each item of cycling clothing. They all live in Rivieras with the extra money you pay for their handiwork.

And then there is E-bay…

You can buy used men’s cycling shorts on E-bay. Because cycling shorts are worn without underwear, an E-bay buyer must have absolute, unwavering confidence in the disinfecting characteristics of their detergent.

Men’s Bike Shorts Leg Lengths

Are you ready for this? Some men’s cycling shorts are longer than others.

That reminds me of one review I read about cycling glasses.

“One must remember that cycling glasses are very close to the eyes”.

If that knucklehead can get away with an observation like that, this knucklehead’ll be bold enough to comment on the relative length of cycling shorts.

Those Funky Men’s Bib Shorts

Bib shorts are cycling shorts with built in suspenders. The suspender’s upward pull keep the chamois up tight against the unseemly parts. This is advantageous because having a loose diaper wiggling around somewhere between you and the saddle is distracting. It can even rub you the wrong way.

That Indispensable Chamois Is What Makes Or Breaks Men’s Cycling Shorts

The most critical aspect of men’s cycling shorts is the chamois insert. This is where ‘the rubber meets the road’. Manufacturers brag freely about the innovative materials and shapes of their chamois. Some like ‘em thick, some like ‘em thin, and all like ‘em just right.

The comfort of each chamois is an individual thing. Unfortunately the rider isn’t sure about such comfort until the shorts have been worn on a few rides and it’s too late to return them. Ha Ha, the joke’s on him.

There is an emphasis on the ability of the chamois to ‘breathe’. Gel inserts are notorious for not breathing, and this lack of respiration results in too much sweat where you don’t want it. Then you have rash, potential for sores, potential for infection, and finally the potential for dismemberment and even death.

Let me know if you’re interested, I have a pair of men’s cycling shorts with a gel insert that I’ve only worn once. Half price.

Hey, here’s a better idea…go to Bike Nashbar where they have upwards of 26 different models of men’s cycling shorts at 50% or more off! ()

There isn’t a whole lot of logic to the whole event…

I was on my mountain bike circumnavigating our local lake on my mountain bike.

I approached a lady and her dog having a delightful frolic in the water.

I decided to be ‘nice’ and not give the elderly woman a heart attack by ‘goin off’ on her dog when he came running toward me.

I extended my hand in friendship to the sucker (the dog, not the lady…but who knows, maybe she wasn’t as pleasant as she seemed to be either).

The dog got within my personal safe zone, and was the first canine in 39 years of running and cycling to get his teeth into me (a mere ‘nip’, but I’ve now been violated and I’ll no longer feel comfortable wearing virgin-white to formal events).

I continued to keep my anger under control, not wanting to unleash my usual red faced dog-rage in the company of another human being (who knows, I may want to run for mayor some day…and with all of these videos coming out of cell phones and making their way onto You Tube).

I finished the ride around the lake with ‘mad enthusiasm’, dismounting and remounting over creeks, barriers, and sandbars.

But with all of the getting off of and onto the bike while trying to keep my ‘angry’ up, I resolved to watch a few You Tube clips on Cyclocross techniques so that my future rides would be smooth and warrior-like.

Although it’s hard to envision the Lycra-clad cyclists in this clip as the fierce, foul-breathed savages I’m determined to emulate, this video by Former cyclocross National Champion, and renowned coach, Clark Natwick will have to suffice…I couldn’t find a clip featuring a cyclist getting off and on his bike with a major league sized baseball bat in his back pocket.

DMT’s a company that’s relatively new in the pro cycling ranks…sort of.

Actually the company’s been around since 1978, quietly making custom cycling shoes for many of the pros, who then put their sponsor’s logo on them.

So although the DMT Radial is rather new to the cycling public, it benefits from the thousands of foot lasts that DMT has made for countless pros.

Maybe you don’t know that you can get some great
shoe deals at Bike Nashbar.
How about deals like $174.99 dollar shoes for $44.99…
or $125.00 shoes for $29.99?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On The Road, It’s Either The DMT Radial Or The DMT Prisma

The DMT Radial shares the top of the podium with the Prisma. They’re essential the same shoe except for the closure system. The Prisma has a cable system like the Specialized BOA, while the Radial has a more traditional three strap Velcro system.

Leather That’s Better Than A Cow, Pig, Or Kangaroo Can Produce

They’re both made of a ‘microfiber’ man-made material, with ventilating mesh put into the mix. The man-made material’s very nice, with some riders describing the uppers as slipper-like and supple (I hate that word…it seems to drain the testosterone right out of me!…but nothing that a Landis-patch won’t solve.)

Making Microfiber

It seems that most of the high end cycling shoes now have their proprietary ‘microfiber’ pseudo leather. I suspect that they’re buying up old Earth shoes, stewing them in a steaming cauldron until the fibers disengage from one another, and then putting them back together using a patented witch’s formula. Thus is born the modern proprietary ‘microfiber’.

What About DMT Radial Width?

DMT’s are wider than Sidi’s (although Sidi makes a wide version that they’ve named ‘mega’), but not as wide as the shoes made by Northwave.

Reminds me of some old story about bears, porridge, and Goldilocks.

I guess this width would be the porridge that’s ‘just right’ if a bear was looking to get into riding a bike instead of lumbering through the forest, searching for his breakfast.

Tater Pinetop Searching For His DMT Radials

Don’t Forget The Nine Layers Of Carbon Fiber

DMT uses a carbon fiber called Toray MR60 in their soles. Allow me to baffle you with bullshit impress you with my carbon fiber research.

This sole has a tensile strength of 40 tons per square centimeter. This means that if ole ‘Tater Pinetop’ tries with all of his might, he’d be unable to flex these soles.

This is the same carbon that Pinarello uses in the frames of their Prince Carbon and Montello FP8 models (so what?)

The nine layers of carbon are laid down at 0 degrees, 45 degrees, and 90 degrees in the following order…from inside out.

0, 45,45, 90, 0, 45, 0, 0, 45.

This sequence is actually the code that the ‘Windtalkers’ used to break the Japanese military code in the South Pacific…saving the world from annihilation!

But DMT thought it was as good as anything other order…and it sounded sexy.

Here’s the purpose of the different angles: 0 degrees runs the length of the sole and provides the overall stiffness, 45 degrees provides torsional stiffness so the the sole won’t flex when under a pronation or supination load, and the 90 degree fibers keep the sole together.

DMT Radial Shoes Designed For Speedplay Pedals

For all you Speedplay pedal enthusiasts, here’s where the DMT Radials really shine. They can be bought with a sole made especially for Speedplay pedals. With no adapters needed, the stack height (distance between the bottom of the foot and the pedals can be as thin as 3.5 mm.

And that means your pedal stroke can be more efficient, and you can beat up on your cycling buddies more effectively.

DMT’s Prisma shoes are at the top of the heap, at least the top of the DMT pile.

Great, we got that out of the way.

If you’re like me, you’ve got problems you won’t be able to concentrate until you’ve slotted the Prisma’s into the DMT ‘order of the universe’. They’re at the pinnacle and they retail for $375.00.

The Uppers

A lot of tootie-fruities cyclists like a ‘patent leather’ looking shoe which was so popular when tap dancers ruled the world.

And the Prismas do a fine job of adding sparkle to the feet. The shiny uppers look like they’re made of plastic, but they’re actually made of a ultralight microfiber material.

This whole ‘microfiber’ business is what most of the top end cycling shoe manufacturers are using in their shoes.

Essentially, they’ve improved on what cows, pigs, and kangaroos have been wearing for quite a while now.

I still can’t find out what the ‘microfiber’ is made of (recycled Earthshoes?), but it really doesn’t matter much.

Suffice it to say that the uppers on the Prisma take advantage of the decades of experience that DMT (they started in the late 1970′s) has in making custom shoes for the monarchs of the pro cycling ranks. The uppers may be shiny, but they’re supple and mucho comfortable.

If it helps any, DMT Prismas are Italian made…and you know what that means.

At least I hope you do, cause I don’t.

As far as width goes, DMT’s are wider than Sidi’s, but not as wide as Northwaves.

And don’t forget to look at the picture above to appreciate the mesh lining that increases air flow to those sweaty dogs you have attached to your ankles.

Maybe you don’t know that you can get some great
shoe deals at Bike Nashbar.
How about deals like $174.99 dollar shoes for $44.99…
or $125.00 shoes for $29.99?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Improving On The Specialized BOA Closure System

I really liked the cable system I had on my Specialized shoes…at least until the tightening dial stripped out and the replacement kit whipped me in an IQ test. The cable system kept a uniform tension on my rapidly rotating feet (never less than Armstrongesque 90 rpm’s), which was very nice.

The fellers (I suspect that Italian shoe makers are seldom called ‘fellers’) at DMT one-upped the BOA system with their own version of the cable system.

They call it the RAM+VTR.

I don’t have to tell you that it stands for Rotary Activated Monofilament – Variable Tension Regulator.

Ole Tater Pinetop

Duh!

Instead of a rotary tightener, they sport a lever-style ratchet. This is reputed to be quicker and easier to reach while riding. I actually had no problem with the ‘quick and easy’ aspect of the BOA system- just the stripped dial.

DMT Prisma’s Stiff Carbon Soles

Using the same carbon that Pinarello makes their Prince Carbon and Montello frames from (Toray MR 60), the soles have a tensile strength of 40 tons per square inch.

Essentially, that means that if ole Tater Pinetop gets a pair of DMT Prismas for Christmas, he’ll be unable to ‘flex’ his DMT Prisma soles…in spite of his sizable mass.

And the sole are made of 9 (NINE) layers of carbon. Some are laid at 0 degrees, others at 45 degrees, while the rest are at 90 degrees.

The 0 degrees fibers run the length of the sole and provide overall stiffness.

The 45 degree fibers provides torsional rigidity so that pronation and supination forces don’t allow the sole to ‘twist’.

The 90 degree fibers hold the sole together so that lateral forces meet their kryptonite!

These Prisma Soles Are Thin

Some people call it ‘stack height’, but essentially the concept is to make the distance from the bottom of the foot to the pedal as small as possible. These soles come in at a mere 3.5 mm.

What makes them even more unique is that there’s a version of the DMT Prisma shoes that is made to accommodate Speedplay pedals without having to use the typical Speedplay adapter plate. They’ve made the entire sole to be the adapter plate!

Result…lower stack height (6 mm closer to the pedal than the typical set-up!).

But, you will need to get Speedplay’s Stainless Steel Wear Protector Kit so that the sole doesn’t get damaged from direct contact with the pedal.

If you’re using the ‘Look’ style cleat, the DMT Prisma model you’ll select will be set up like the typical cycling shoe.

All Raves, No Rants

I’ve scoured the world-wide-web for all things related to the DMT Prisma, and can find no Rants…and that’s not very common in a virtual world in which so many impotent individuals fine gentlemen feel safe to ‘let-er-rip’ from behind the safety of their keyboard (witness Yours Truly!).

So it’s all raves and no rants for the DMT Prismas…if you have close to $400 for a pair!

My first reaction to any ‘advice’ regarding the best way to go uphill on a bike is to scoff and strut around the room manly-style. After all, it’s all about taking the pain without whimpering and crying, isn’t it?

That’s mostly right, and I know that the majority of cyclists know that getting uphill is largely a matter of ‘sucking it up’.

On the other side of the spectrum, I suppose there are those riders who’re looking for a magic pill to get up the climb…just as there are chubby people who’re looking to shed forty pounds by detoxing themselves and ridding themselves of fecal matter they’ve been harboring for the last 20 years.

As an aside, people in the ‘detox group’ are the only people I know of who’re hoping to be full of crap.

Back to the subject at hand…namely climbing.

There are a few tips, besides ‘manning up’ to be learned.

One of them is to keep the upper body as relaxed as possible. I’m currently trying to get in the habit of relaxing my face and jaw when the pain really starts to bore into me. Same goes for my arms and the force with which I’m gripping the handlebars.

If your face is contorting in a mask of agony, and every sinew in your forearms and biceps is visible, you aren’t doing too well with the ‘relax your upper body’ routine. Same goes for any ‘white knuckle’ grabbing of the handlebars.

Why waste calories tightening up the face muscles, when that energy could be better used in the quads?

Ever wonder if it’s best to take the steep inside line of a hairpin turn rather than the less steep, outside line?

Well, you’ll get some helpful advice regarding getting up a mountain from a cycling pro in the following video…

By making the skinsuit tight, and by adding material under the armpits as well as across the chest, air coming off of the arms and chest flows more smoothly and doesn’t create the eddies that rob the cyclist of aerodynamic efficiency.

But Is It All For Naught?

While reading of this near-scandalous skinsuit development over at VeloNews.com, one of the reader’s comments caught my attention.

He rightfully noted that it’s rather foolish for so much effort to go into skinsuit development when riders can’t even keep their head in a proper aero position for the duration of the ride.

And do you know why they can’t?

Because it’s about as easy to keep your head up in that neck-cramping position as it is to get through a revolving door with a surfboard.

Keeping my head up while in an aggressive time trial position gets to be as painful as keeping my massive thighs pumping at pavement melting speeds.

I Need A Mirror…And So Does Alberto!

What I need is a little mirror somewhere between the extensions of my aero bars. The mirror would be angled so that I could see ahead of me while keeping my head DOWN.

I know that it’d be awkward, but if truck drivers can back up those big rigs while using only their mirrors…I can develop ‘mirror-steering’ skills too!

Come to think of it, I did have decent periscope talents back in the days of my youth.

…And submarine-steering sailors do well with mirrored gadgets as well.

For those of you who think this is some trivial matter…get on one of those TT bikes (set in an aggressive posture; not the casual set-ups used by cyclists who are only pretending to be time trialists).

Then you’ll know that neck pain may indeed exceed quad pain when going all out in a time trial.

Check out this picture…even Contador has to lower his head at times, creating ‘helmet drag’.

What if Alberto Contador could just keep his head down the entire ride, steering with the Dr. Ron’s innovative time trial mirror?

Lemond On Primitive TT Bike

The Specialized Shiv that Contador, Schleck, and anyone else riding Specialized bikes at the tour got a lot of attention for its innovation and aerodynamic slipperiness.

And rightly so.

After all, it was only as recently as 1989 that Greg Lemond’s totally revolutionary ‘aero’ bike had the members of the French press wadding up their panties and choking on their baguettes.

Lemond used the primitive aero bike in this picture to beat Laurent Fignon by 8 seconds in the Tour.

Fignon Relies On Receding Hairline For Aero Effect

So when we find out that the Specialized Shiv has ‘hidden’ rear brake calipers, cables within the tubing of the frame, and an assortment of other great innovations, we go gah gah.

The BMC Time Machine’s Got The Front End To Beat All Front Ends

But check out the BMC Time Machine front end that allowed Cadel Evans to ride the time trial while standing on his head!

Now that’s what I call a radical front end. Armed with such innovation, Cadel’s elbows are as low as the top tube.

It’s as crazy and intriguing as a good limbo contest.

“Ian” Discusses Last Year’s BMC Time Machine

While this video isn’t about Cadel’s exact 2010 BMC Time Machine, it’s very interesting regarding the extreme lengths to which the bike companies are going in order to produce the best time trial bikes that money can buy.

The Cycling-review blog took a monumental dive during the Tour de France. You’d think that this blogger’d be inspired enough to blog, blog, blog.

Not so.

It seems all cycling energy was channeled toward affixing my buttocks to our lumpy sofa…watching Versus with Phil and Paul commentating.

The tour was very entertaining and because we have DVR, and we’re able to fast forward through the commercials, I was able to sooth my aching conscious (‘Get your sorry gluts off the couch, Mr. Potatobutt and write something on your blog for the hairy unwashed to read’) by fooling myself into thinking that I wasn’t wasting too much time in spectator mode.

After all, I was only wasting spending two hours a day watching other guys ride, not three.

Visions Of Past Glory

Well, I’m back to the keyboard and onto my bike again. In a queer twist of laziness fate, even my riding suffered from the grand tour. Not so much that I’ll have to revert back to bike-balancing lessons, but enough that my conditioning’ll need a boost.

Maybe it was a good thing, since my riding ambition had been waning lately anyway. Sometimes a break from constantly hammering the road is what’s needed to re-ignite the cycling fires within.

As you can assume by reading this blog post-patheticus, it’s not always easy to get momentum after a long lay-off.

Same goes for getting back to training…but I’m confident that I’ll make it around the block- it’s not very far, and I can stop for a breather if I need to.

When I started bike racing I took a ‘cycling skills’ workshop. I learned a lot, and one of the things we were exposed to was ‘contact cycling’. Up until that workshop I was mistakenly under the impression that cyclists on two different bikes shouldn’t bang into each other.

In my mind, if there was contact it was time to panic.

But the workshop taught me differently. One of the most interesting drills was riding beside another rider while leaning hard into them…shoulder to shoulder. If both riders were committed to the drill, they could get some pretty hearty lean going into each other.

We did the drill on grass and at some pretty slow speeds. It was fun to find out that contact with another rider wasn’t necessarily time to panic.

But in yesterday’s Tour de France I saw a couple of interesting ‘lean on you’s’ that ended in POOR OUTCOMES.

In the first incident, the peloton was going all out in order to set up the finish for the sprinters. About 2 km from the finish there was a precarious right hand turn and a crash that ‘took out’ a couple of the sprinters. It was an example of ‘leaning gone bad’.

As they rounded the turn, a Lampre rider was on the outside of Mark Cavendish and appeared to lean into him.

Next thing you know, Cavendish’s leaning back on him. Only trouble is…Cavendish’s no longer leaning into the turn. And as he failed to make the turn, he took out a couple of other riders as well, including sprinter Oscar Freire.

Cavendish makes his living in the shoulder to shoulder battlefield at the end of bunch sprints and I suspect that he instinctively leans back on riders when they make contact. It’s an instinct that doesn’t work very well in turns.

The second incident occurred at the very end of the bunch sprint. Although the video below doesn’t show it very clearly, I saw a different replay showing Robbie Mc Ewen shouldering his way through on the left of the screen, causing the rider who you later see standing in the middle of the road with his arm raised, to veer into Tyler Farrar.

Only trouble was…the second rider’s bike was now attached to Farrar’s rear derailleur. Although he’s a strong young man, Tyler was unable to compete while riding one bike and pulling another along the pavement.

So what I see was a first incident in which aggressively leaning back into his opponent may have been Cavendish’s downfall and a second incident in which not leaning back enough to maintain his ‘line’ may have been the downfall of the rider who ultimately donated his bike to Ferrar’s sprinting efforts.

But it made for some very interesting racing, with me howling and popping up and down while safely perched on the edge of my couch.

My good friend and coach Bruce Hendler recently wrote a nice summary of the issues facing master’s racers. And racing as an ‘old man’ isn’t as futile as you may think.

Here’s an excerpt…”As a coach, I am continuously amazed at how well masters athletes can perform, especially versus younger athletes.”

Of course some of us ultra-competitive guys know in our ‘inner selves’ that even Lance Armstrong wouldn’t have stood a chance if we’d been racing when we were young.

Ha! Take that.

But enough of the bravado and posturing, here is some of what Bruce wrote after working with hundreds of masters cyclists.

I’ll include a tidbit from each segment of his article. You can see the original article by clicking on the link at the bottom of the page.

• Maximum heart rates drop with each year we trod the highways and bi-ways of this ole planet. This may necessitate a ‘recalibration’ of training intensity zones.
• Body composition shifts…and not in the most excellent direction.
• Max VO2 drops about 10% per decade.
• It takes longer to recover from workouts as the years go on. Bruce didn’t write this, but I’ll just add that you won’t be able to recover at all from the second to last day of your life.
• As the years go on, we lose our ability to detect thirst.
• We become more sensitive to heat as the years accumulate.
• And to top it off, we’ve got them outnumbered…USA cycling has 53% of its members between the ages of 35-54 and only 19% of its members from the ages of 19-34.


You can easily get to the ‘real’ article here.

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